TOS logged in
by animeice335
Summary: What happens when TOS get in a chatroom together, and what happens in the outside world while their not in the cyberworld?
1. Chapter 1

Regal sat down at his desk and turned on his laptop. He was going to see what was going on today so he went to google and typed in chatrooms. He went down the list and found the one he was looking for. "Symphonias Heroes" He clicked on it

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**Swordmaster:** Heya guys!

**ILoveLloydie:** Hi my cute little Lloydie

**GrandSorcerer: **Hi guys!

**BeautifulSummoner: **Colette, me and Lloyd are going out, remember, so dont call him Lloydie. Hi everyone!

**Beautifulchosen: **Im having a party at my house tonight, whos coming over

**Swordmaster: **That sounds cool, count me in

**GrandSorcerer-BeautifulSummoner:** No ur not!

**Swordmaster: **why not

**GrandSorcerer: **Last time we went to one of Zelos's parties it was full of whores and crackheads.

**BeautifulSummoner:** Im really proud of u for not doing anything there Lloyd, since i got there an hour late.But ur still not going.

**Swordmaster: **Dont worry Sheena, id never do anything with another girl

**ILoveLloydie: **Lloydie would never do anything bad, in fact he was helping Chocolat change her clothes

**BeautifulSummoner: **change her clothes...

**Swordmaster: **Colette what are u talking about...

**ILoveLloydie: **It was at Zelos's party, i saw u through the crack in the door. u were helping Chocolat undress then u closed the door so i couldnt see anymore

**GrandSorcerer:**...

**ILoveLloydie: **Then after that he went and got some punch, 2 cups, then he went over and was talking to Zelos when Kate the scientist lady came over and asked Lloyd if he wanted some "poonani". Then he followed her to a room downstairs and locked the door...i was sad. But then he came out half an hour later and found u then he gave u a kiss...i want to be kissed by Lloydie (

**GrandSorcerer: **Did you follow him the whole time?

**ILoveLloydie: **Of course )

**GrandSorcerer:**...

**BeautifulSummoner:** Lloyd!

**Swordmaster:**...

**Swordmaster signed off**

**BeautifulSummoner: **Grrrrrrr

**BeautifulSummoner signed off**

**ILoveLloydie:** poor lloydie...what do u want to talk about Genis

**GrandSorcerer: **...i feel so alone

**MisunderstoodBlossom signed on**

**GrandSorcerer: **Hi Presea )

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**Hello...

**ILoveLloydie:** Hi peep peep

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...

**GrandSorcerer:**...

**ILoveLloydie:** Frosted Flakes is my favorite cereal, u know why? because its Lloydies

**MiunderstoodBlossom:**...

**GrandSorcerer:**...um colette, why did u call Presea peep peep

**ILoveLloydie:**thats her nickname silly

**GrandSorcerer:**...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...

**ILoveLloyd: **I found choclate at school today, someone left it in Raines cabinet

**GrandSorcerer: **Choclate?...wait Raines cabinet, she doesnt keep choclate in there, only her artifacts...

**RUINS4EVER:** YOUR THE ONE WHO TOOK MY 500 YEAR OLD DOGSHIT! AND ATE IT!

**GrandSorcerer: **Who are u. And have u been watching us this whole time?

**RUINS4EVER:** um...maybe

**RUINS4EVER signed off**

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** weird...

**GrandSorcerer:**ya...

**GrandSorcerer:** i just realized something, what happend to Zelos?

**Beautifulchosen: **oh uh sorry i was busy...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** busy with what

**Beautifulchosen:** i was um...organizing my...stamp collection

**GrandSorcerer:** u dont have a stamp collection...

**Beautifulchosen: **oh, stamp collection, i didnt mean stamp collection...my sword collection

**GrandSorcerer: **sword collection...

**Beautifulchosen: **ya, i probly have over 500 now, i guess since i use 2 swords though i only have 250 pairs...i think...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** 2 swords...

**GrandSorcerer: **you dont use 2 swords

**Beautifulchosen: **of course i do Genis

**GrandSorcerer:** 1. no u dont ...2. when have u ever called me by my name, u usually call me brat

**Beautifulchosen:** of course i call u Genis, why wouldnt i call u Genis...oh shit...

**GrandSorcerer:** wait...is this Lloyd

**Beautifulchosen: **NO, what would make u think that Genis

**GrandSorcerer: **hmm...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** Lloyds mother is so ugly she makes Rodyle look good...

**Beautifulchosen: **U TAKE THAT BACK DAMMIT!

**GrandSorcerer:** Ah Ha! it is Lloyd, good job Presea

**MisunderstoodBloosom: **lloyd...what are u doing in Zelos's house

**Beautifulchosen: **uh...i was...cleaning

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** ...

**GrandSorcerer: **are u there for Zelos's party

**Beautifulchosen: **well after Sheena got mad at me i needed comfort, and Zelos offered )

**GrandSorcerer: **o.0

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...

**Beautifulchosen:** what?

**GrandSorcerer:** um...how did Zelos comfort you...

**Beautifulchosen: **i dont know yet, he said hes going to go change

**GrandSorcerer: **o.0...Lloyd get out of there now!

**Beautifulchosen: **Zelos locked the door before he left, he said it was so none of his hunnies would disturb me while he was getting changed. why should i get out?

**ILoveLloydie:**Zelos is going to take u swimming

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...what were u doing the whole time Colette

**ILoveLloydie: **i was eating Frosted Flakes

**Beautifulchosen: **i love Frosted Flakes

**IloveLloydie:** i know )

**Beautifulchosen: **i have to go now guys Zelos is back, i cant wait to go swimming

**GrandSorcerer: **No wait!

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** Lloyd!

**Beautifulchosen signed out**

**Lloyd gained the title "Dumb Sexfiend"**

**Zelos gained the title "Michael Jackson"**

**GrandSorcerer:**...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...

**GrandSorcerer:** hes a goner...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** yup...

**ILoveLloydie: **I heard a loud noise

**GrandSorcerer:**...

**ILoveLloydie signed out**

**Colette gained the title "Retarded Dumbass"**

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **praise the lord

**Barbiegirl signed in**

**Agarazium signed in**

**Stupidvermin signed in**

**GrandSorcerer: **Oh god no...

**Barbiegirl: **yes, it is i, Mithos

**Agarazium:** i better be getting paid to be in this stupid chatroom with u stupid people

**Stupidvermin: **i agree

**Agarazium: **Magnius ur the stupidest of everyone, u get paid in cheese...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...

**GrandSorcerer: **What do u want Mithos...

**Barbiegirl: **Im bored...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** dont u have your bardie dolls to play with

**Barbiegirl:**no...(

**Agarazium:** Yuan stole them

**Stupidvermin:**im going to eat some cheese in the Meltokio sewers with my family

**Stupidvermin signed out**

**GrandSorcerer: **One down...

**Barbiegirl: **Genis i have something to tell u...

**Agarazium: **ew, yuck, not this again...(shivers) im leaving. By the way, i quit.

**Agarazium signed out**

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **2 down

**Barbiegirl:**...Genis...i love u

**Barbiegirl signed out**

**GrandSorcerer:** o.0...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** very weird...but not surprising

**Regretfulswordsman signed in**

**Regretfulswordsman: **hello...do u know where Sheena is

**GrandSorcerer: **no

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **why do u want to know

**Regretfulswordsman: **because...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...

**GrandSorcerer: **because why...

**RUINS4EVER signed on**

**Regretfulswordsman: **because ive been physically lonely for 15 years

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...

**GrandSorcerer: **ok...RUINS4EVER, who are u

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **what makes u think Sheenas going to do that with u anyway

**Regretfulswordsman:**because of my charm and good looks, besides, i only have to get her on one date...according to this little book

**GrandSorcerer: **little book?

**Regretfulswordsman: **Yes, i found this book, i dont know who wrote it but it tells how u can get some in only one night...even if its by force

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **date rape?

**Regretfulswordsman:** yes...

**GrandSorcerer: **who would write a book about date rape?

**RUINS4EVER:** A person that wants Kratos, Regal, and Lloyd really bad...

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**...

**GrandSorcerer:**...

**Regretfulswordsman:**...me?

**RUINS4EVER:** yes u...but now...u have stolen my book, u will not be forgiven...espicially since u considered Sheena over me...

**RUINS4EVER signed out**

**Regretfulswordsman:**ill be going now...

**Regretfulswordsman signed out**

**Kratos gained the title "Lonely Pervert"**

**GrandSorcerer: **weird...

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **very...

**BeautifulSummoner** **signed in**

**BeautifulSummoner: **Hi guys

**GrandSorcerer:**Hi Sheena

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **Hello Sheena

**BeautifulSummoner:** can i ask u guys a question?

**GrandSorcerer:** What?

**BeautifulSummoner: **Well...should i stay with Lloyd...

**GrandSorcerer:** Well...he is my best friend...but, considering he slept with Chocolat and Kate...

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **Absolutely no

**GrandSorcerer:** Sheena, ur a very nice person and u look good to, im sure theres tons of people that would go out with u

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **except Kratos

**GrandSorcerer:**ya, stay away from Kratos...far away

**BeautifulSummoner:** lol, Kratos, hes like 5000 years old, no way. plus hes just a pervert anyway. Thanks guys.

**MisunderstoodBlossom:**isnt there anyone u would even consider to be bf material

**BeautifulSummoner:** Well...i dont think he likes me, hes 33 too. I doubt he would want a 19 year old. He doesnt seem like the kind of guy who goes after someone for their looks.

**MisunderstoodBlossom:** Who is it?

**BeautifulSummoner: **Regal...

**MasterofGreaves signed in**

**MasterofGreaves:** Sheena...i do like you

**BeautifulSummoner: **Regal?...u do...?

**MasterofGreaves:**yes i do...alot

**BeautifulSummoner:** oh Regal...

**MasterofGreaves:** pick u up tomorrow morning at 8?

**BeautifulSummoner:** Ill be ready

**MasterofGreaves signed out**

**BeautifulSummoner:**Ahhhhhhh, omg, YES!Thanks u guys, so much, i cant wait till tomorrow

**GrandSorcerer:**dont worry about it Sheena, thats what friends are for

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **Im happy for u Sheena

**BeautifulSummoner: **Thanks guys bye, Its like Heaven, Regals 50 times better then Lloyd

**BeautifulSummoner signed out**

**Sheena gained the title "Head over Heels"**

**GrandSorcerer: **im happy for her

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **me to

**ThePope signed in**

**ThePope:**Presea, u have been requested for an audience with the king.

**MisunderstoodBlossom: **understood, Genis i will talk to u later

**GrandSorcerer:** Ok, bye Presea

**ThePope signed out**

**MisunderstoodBlossom signed out**

**Presea gained the title "Socially Sane Guard"**

**The Pope gained the title "The Poop"**

**Beauifulchosen signed on**

**Beautifulchosen: **Hey brat whacha doin

**GrandSorcerer:**nothing...

**Beautifulchosen:**why dont u come over to the party

**GrandSorcerer:**...wheres Lloyd...

**Beautifulchosen: **Hes downstairs getting drinks )

**GrandSorcerer:** what did u do to Lloyd

**Beautifulchosen:** what?...oh...lets just say he wont be with anyone else for a while hehe )

**GrandSorcerer: **...

**Beautifulchosen: **once uve had the Zelos u never want anyone else

**GrandSorcerer: **0.o...U PERVERTED RAPIST

**Beautifulchosen: **:) its only rape if he doesnt like it...hehe

**GrandSorcerer: **XO ewwwwwwwwwww, omg, my brain has been tainted with unpure imgaes

**RUINS4EVER signed in**

**RUINS4EVER: **Zelos were u the one that stole a pink thong from Raine Sages closet

**Beautifulchosen: **why actually yes i did,Lloyd liked it alot, and who might u be my mysterious hunnie?

**GrandSorcerer: **o.0...

**RUINS4EVER: **...

**RUINS4EVER signed out**

**Beautifulchosen:** i have to go and keep my hunnies company byebye :)

**Beautifulchosen signed out**

**GrandSorcerer: **what an ass, i bet he was grinning like an idiot the entire time...and now im talking to myself...

**RUINS4EVER signed in **

**RUINS4EVER:** Genis u just CURSED!

**GrandSorcerer:**...who are u

**RUINS4EVER: **Rain...Raiseila...

**GrandSorcerer: **...wait...

**RUINS4EVER:** IM GONNA GET U!

**RUINS4EVER signed out**

**Raine gained the title "Physchotic Bitch"**

**GrandSorcerer: **...o.0...HOLY SHIT XO I NEED TO GET THE OUTA HERE

**GrandSorcerer signed off**

**Genis gained the title "Sane Genius"**

** The next morning...**

**Meltokio Daily News Reports**

**A blonde girl was found drowned in a bowl of Frosted Flakes in her home.**

**An older man with dark brown hair was found in his home today chained to his bed, he was unconsious but from what we can tell he was raped.**

**A man with wings and long, blue hair, stole all "Barbie" products last night and has disappearded with them. Because of this we found a little girl crying hystericly in her home last night. When we offered to help her she said she was actually a "boy". So we shipped her off to a mental facility for young girls. The name of this facility is "Zelos's Home for Mental Little Girls", there is also another one for "Zelos's Home for Mental Little Boys". **

**Zelos Wilder's home was set on fire last night after an insane woman came in yelling strange things like "Give me my thong" and "Genis im going to kill you". The police tried to capture her but whenever they got close she would whack them with her staff or cast a "Ray" spell. They are still looking for this woman.**

**A twelve year old boy was found outside Zelos Wilder's house last night. He said he was hiding from his "Insane child abusing sister". He said he just made it out of the burning house before it had collapsed. According to the information he gave us Zelos Wilder and Lloyd Irving are trapped alone in the basement under the collapsed house, we are still trying to get them out at this time. The boy also says he is sueing his sister and is going to try to get out of her custody.**

**Last night a pipe broke in the Meltokio sewers and it was flooded. Anything in the sewers would have been washed out ot sea. People are grateful though because they said the rats had multiplied in the last couple of days. Possibly to a increase in food.**

**Presea Combatir has been pronounced has the Kings royal body guard. We also have been informed that The Pope is constipated.**

**Human Ranches all over the world last night were destroyed. We have been informed that it was Pronyma, one of The Grand Cardinals. We interviewed her and she says "I didnt get paid enough to put up with that crap". She is now working as a lingerie model and is happily living with her fiance, Forcystus.**

**We have been informed that Regal Bryant and Sheena Fujibayashi are getting married. And do to our resources we have found out they are going to adopt Genis Sage. **

**Police are trying to catch a young lady by the name of Chocolat. She has been running through the streets since 5 in the morning only wearing a bra and a pair of underwear. **

**Zelos's Home for Mental little girls**

5 girls were sitting in a circle in a room with 2 bunkbeds, talking about...boys.

"So Mithos, who do you like"

"His name is...Kratos, hes my new crush"

"Cool, what do u guys wanna do? My little pony, we can use my easy bake oven, or we could put some make up on, we can play dressup, Cabbage patch kids, Bratz, we can play house, Mithos can be the mommy"

Mithos says"Those things sound so cool, what should we do first"

"Lets play my little Pony, while were doing that, Miranda can bake us some easy bake cookies"

While they werent looking Miranda took Mithos's pony and threw it in the oven. Then Mithos cried...

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**Author:**No flames please, this is my first shot at a humor fanfic. hope u like it.


	2. Chapter 2

Genis was standing in the middle of Meltokio being bored as usual. Llloyd came out of nowhere and sat down beside him.

"Hi lloyd, um...are u feeling ok"

"Of course i am would why wouldnt i"

"Well, u just spent 24 hours trapped in a basement with zelos..."

"Whats so bad about that"

"..."

Suddenly colette fell out of the sky landing on her face, she quickly got up like nothing had happend

"LLOYDIE"

Colette wrapped her arms around Lloyd

Lloyd: Hi colette

Genis:colette i heard u drowned in a bowl of frosted flakes

colette: i did

Genis:...then how are u alive now

colette: i dont know...

Then while she was still wrapped around lloyd she started making movements with her hips so that they were banging into lloyds leg

Genis: oh my god, MY EYES they BURN

lloyd:I need a haircut... he being oblivious to anything that was happening...

Genis then took a random box of Frosted Flakes and threw them on someones roof

Colette:NOOOOOOOOOOO

She quickly got off Lloyd and went for the frosted flakes

Genis:this would be easier if she couldnt fly...come on Lloyd lets go

He grabbed the swordsman that was also trying to go after the frosted flakes and dragged him down an ally. When they got to the far end they found they were in Meltokio slums...They saw two little girls arguing on the corner of the sidewalk, they were dressed in kinky red dresses.

random girl 1: this is my turf

random girl 2:u better back off right now unless u wanna be bitched slapped

random girl 1: u better watch ya mouth ho

random girl 2: Bitch!

She slapped the other one, the one who was slapped ran away crying. A man dressed in a kinky blue dress came out of nowhere and kicked the little girl

Random man dressed in drag: This is my turf now

The little girl ran away crying. The man pulled lipstick out of his purse and started putting it on himself. When suddenly Raine came out of nowhere and started beating the man with her staff

Raine:My spot, Back OFF!

The drag ran away crying and Raine stood there fixing her hair. Then when she noticed Lloyd and Genis staring at her she froze. Suddenly a look of anger came on her face

Raine: Genis u CURSED

Genis grabbed Lloyds arm and ushered him to run. They went between 2 houses running their little asses off, as Genis past a window he saw Kvar crying while watching Passions. They came out the other side and ran down the street, Raine tripped and fell. Once she got up she noticed she landed in fresh dogshit.

Raine: WHO THE LEFT DOG SHIT IN THE MIDDLE OF THE ROAD

She spotted a dog that was standing near her and lunged at it. At the same time colette had been looking for Lloyd and Genis when she saw the dog.

Colette:(gasp) DOGGIE, let me take you to my house where i shall secretly rape and give you a pet name like i do with all the dogs i find!

They reached the dog at the same time and it started glowing.

Raine: There is only one thing to do. Colette, i wager my Book on Date Rape against your box of Frosted Flakes

Colette: I LOVE Frosted Flakes

Raine\Colette: SYMPHONIA SHOWDOWN!

There was a bright flash of light, when it cleared Raine and Colette were in Meltokio sewers.

Tabithas Voice: The challenge is who ever gets to the end of the sewers first wins

Raine and Colette headed off and were at the same pace. Then they got to a part where they had to cross rat infested water

Colette: Oh no what do i do

Raine:U should fly...

Colette:Ohm OK!

Colettes wings appeared and she started flying across the water, she was doing ok until Raine jumped onto her.

Colette:Get off

Raine:I will give u Frosted Flakes

Colette:Really, thank you so much FatMan

Raine:WHAT!

Raine used her free hand to beat Colette with her staff, this caused Colette to fall into the water. The rats started swarming over them

Colette:awwwww, cute little mousies

Raine: Someone just bit me...

She started smacking in random places in the water. They didnt notice that someone was sitting in the shadows watching them, someone with bright red hair nibbling on a hunk of cheese.

Magnius: Yes my pretties eat, Eat. MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

There was a squeaking sound coming from the rat beside him

Magnius:Sorry mom...ill go do something else

(Meanwhile)

Lloyd:Whered she go

Genis: I dont know but we have to find a place to hide

Suddenly Chocolat ran past them in her bra and underwear

Genis:...ok...random

Lloyd: ya...yum

Genis:...yum?

Lloyd licked his lips"ya, yum"

Genis:...

While muttering 'totally gross sick bastard' under his breath Genis pointed to a big building ahead of them and they ran toward it. When Genis tripped and yelled

Lloyd:Whats wrong

Genis: Something grabbed my foot

Lloyd looked at his foot and found a hand clamped around it. The hand was sticking out of a sewer vent. He took out his swords and slashed the hand, there was a yelp and the hand retreated back inside the vent. Lloyd got down and looked in the vent and screamed like a little girl

Genis: Lloyd whats wrong!

Lloyd:I just saw one of the ugliest things ever!

Genis: What?

Lloyd:Magnius

Now Genis screamed like a little girl. After that happened they got up and ran towards the building. They went in a side door and suddenly found themselves on the side of a stage.

Genis:Where are we, Lloyd you have any ideas

He looked over to his friend and found his friend drooling, he followed his friends gaze and gasped. Pronyma was walking on stage, wearing lingerie! Genis got closer and looked out into the stage and he saw, The Pope, Zelos, and in the very back in the corner seat he could see Kratos. Then he felt a wet spot on his shoulder...?

Genis:What the...

Lloyd had drooled on him, he back handed Lloyd

Genis: Lloyd, would you stop thinking about sex for once

Lloyd:milkshakes...

Genis:...

Random voice:What are you doing here

They turned around to see 5 of the kings guards behind them. Lloyd drew his swords

Genis: we dont have time for this...

The gaurds came closer backing Lloyd and Genis up against a wall, when suddenly there was a loud farting sound and a very bad smell. They looked over and the Pope was crying, brown liquid slowly leaked down the sides of the chair.

Genis:Ewwww...

Lloyd:Dam

Zelos:Talk about nasty...Lloyd?

Kratos: Im so lonely ive been forced into male prostitution...

Everyone turned back to look at him, Zelos was the only one who started making Kissy faces at him.

ThePope:Guards dispose of them, and after that...get me another Huggies diaper

Genis:I thought u were constipated

Pope: I was but now i have diarhea

Genis:oka...

The guards closed in on them

Lloyd:Dam that really stinks...i think my nostrils are actually burning

Zelos: Lloyd, jump into my arms

Zelos was getting up from his seat holding out his arms

Genis:Ewww...

Lloyd: Ok

Genis:Lloyd!

Genis grabbed him by his collar with his left hand and used his right to raise his Kendama in the air

Genis:Take a bath, TIDAL WAVE!

The spell was cast out in the audience, Kratos, Pope, and Zelos were going around in circle in the vortex

Zelos:I just had my shirt dry cleaned...wahhhhhhh

Kratos: What am i going to do this is my only pair of clothes and i have an appointment in 5 minutes...these have been my clothes for 4000 years and theyve never been washed until now...

The water around the pope was turning brown...

Lloyd and Genis ran to the other side of the stage while the guards sat there staring at the water farting

Guard 1:Good one man

Guard 2: hahaha, WOAH, that one stinks

Guard 3:Lets try this one...(Poot)WOAAAH hahaha

Guard 4: haha cool, i wanna try it...(snivel), i think i did it a little too hard

Guard 5: hahaha, were gonna have to get you one of the Popes diapers

(Meanwhile at a certain mental facility)

"Eat it"

I dont want to"

"I said eat it"

Mithos took the "pudding" in front of him and lifted it up to his face

"I dont like my little pony pudding..."He stared into the bowl of melted plastic and hair that had once been his My little Pony

Miranda backhanded him

"EAT IT"

"NO"

Mithos started glowing then turned into Yggdrasil. He cast spark web on Miranda and she fell to the ground

"Time to put my plan into action MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

A little girl came in the room

"Mithos, you said you would have tea with me"

"Fine, I shall have tea then put my plan into action MUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA"

Somewhere above the building there was a rainbow, and on the rainbow was Yuan playing with his Barbies. Ken was having an affair with California Kelly and Barbie just found out...what shall happen.

(Meanwhile in Meltokio sewers)

Raine and Colette were soaking wet running through the sewers. They were almost to the finish line.

Colette: Frosted Flakes

The box of frosted flakes started glowing and it opened up, the flakes came out and hit Raine

Raine:Ow, theres one in my eye

Raine went a little slower

Colette was going to win...until she tripped...while she was flying?

Slamming her face into the ground

Colette:Ouchies

Raine got over the finish line and found the dog in a cage

Raine:AH HA, i have won

She touched the cage...nothing happend

Raine:AHEM, i won...

Tabithas Voice: We are not responsible for teleporting you back to where you last came, Symphonia Showdowns dont have enough funding anymore...ever since that day...when Zelos decided to invest his money into a Victorias Secrets

Raine:Im stuck down here!

Colette sat there happily eating her Frosted Flakes

Colette:Dont worry FatMan, im sure will get out

(Meanwhile)

Genis and Lloyd escaped and ran into Presea

Presea: Here i know where you guys can hide

She took them to a backroom in the castle, which turned out to be a bathroom, everything was normal except the giant golden toilet.

Genis:What this?

Presea: Its the Golden Toilet

They heard the guards coming so they hid behind the toilet, but when they looked out the door they found out the guards were chasing Chocolat that was randomly running through the castle.

When the others turned around they found that Lloyd was sitting on the toilet

Genis:WTH are you doing Lloyd

Lloyd: What does it look like?

Genis and presea just sighed

(Meanwhile)

After Raine had stopped beating the shit out of Colette she noticed some fungus on the wall and decided to study it. Colette then noticed that there was a shiny red button on the wall.

Colette: So red...like Lloyds clothes...must touch lloyds clothes...

She pressed the button that had the words 'emergency flood' above it

(Meanwhile)

Genis:Hurry up Lloyd...

Lloyd: these things take time...

Presea:Whats that rumbling sound

Suddenly water came rushing out of the toilet, everyone was whisked out the door except for 2 people that had landed in the bathtub.

Raine: What is this...

Lloyd had lost his pants in the flood...

Raine:OMG LLOYD U BASTARD

She lifted her cane...

Lloyd:AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Colette: NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, THAT THING BELONGS TO ME!

Colette jumped out of nowhere and got in the way of Lloyds crouch...

Lloyd ran out of the bathroom shutting the door behind him. Then he found his pats that were draped over Preseas head. Genis and presea then recovered from the flood and got up.

Lloyd:Thank you for holding onto my pants Presea

Presea:...fuck you

Suddenly Raine broke down the bathroom door

Raine:Genis you cursed, Lloyd you made me touch something...well i did want to touch it...but thats not the point, and Presea you...you...are 26 years old but are in a 12 year olds body, i must disect you!

The three then started running up a flight of stairs that went up to the very top of the castle to a balcony. The race goes as follows, Lloyd,Genis,Presea,Raine,Colette, Chocolat, and two of the kings guards.

When they got to the top the three were backed against the poorly built wooden balcony. Raine stood before them while Colette flew in random circles above their heads.

Raine:Ive got you MUAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA

Chocolat came running from the stairs and jumped off the balcony, everyone watched as she fell helplessly toward the ground. But surprisingly, she landed on top of a stampede of women all ages.

Genis:Whats going on

The guards came and one spoke up before giggling like a school girl

Random guard that was chasing half naked Chocolat: Its the stampede for Zelos we have every year, who ever can catch Zelos first wins...Teehee

Then with those words jumped off the balcony into the crowd that was five stories below...

Lloyd:Hey i have an idea

Genis:Dont even think about it

Colette:Hey, i have an idea

Genis:...Lloyd whats your idea

Lloyd:We make Raine jump off the balcony by telling her there is a random artifact down there

Genis:...1. I doubt she would fall for that and 2. you just said that outloud so she could hear it

Colette:What about my idea

Genis:...we have nothing else...sure...

Colette:Ok, so i take Lloydie to the nearest bedroom, while were striping each other i use my tongue to...

Genis and Presea gave each other looks of disgust

Genis: Lightning!

Colette was then knocked to the ground by the lighting attack. Raine sat indian style reading a book titled "Zelos's 1 million ways to charm someone, and or get in bed with them"

Raine: Lloyd, when i say to you 'i want a steaming hot cup of you naked' what goes through your mind

Lloyd:Umm...a medium rare steak with italian sause

Everyone stared at Lloyd, except for Colette, she was blankly staring at him while she was drooling.

Raine:wrong answer...THEN YOU MUST DIE!

Colette: No LLOYDIE, ill save you, SACRIFICE!

Unfortunatly, maybe it is actually fortunate for them, in this story Colettes sacrifice doesnt heal people, it just makes a big explosion.

BOOM

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The crappy balcony that was bound to collapse in a couple days blew up sending everyone falling down toward the stampede below


	3. Chapter 3

And they fell, and they fell...and they fell. Genis sighed "Ok, this is highly impossible, weve been falling for 5 minutes..."

Lloyd: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

Genis:Lloyd stop screaming, at this rate it will be hours before we hit the ground

Raine was trying to air-swim her way over to Colette so she could whack her for making them fall, sadly she was not getting anywhere. While this was happening Colette was singing a different version of the song 'Girls just want to have fun' but every time the word girls came up she replaced it with Lloyd so it was 'Lloyd just wants to have fun' sometimes she would also say 'Lloyd just wants to have fun, with me'.

Presea:And you people wonder why i dont like to be within a mile of you anymore...

Then they all landed in the stampede, except Colette, she landed on concrete.

Genis, Lloyd, and Presea were kept above the crowd riding on the masses of people. Raine had fallen into the stampede, so right now she would be getting trampled by thousands of Nikes.

Lloyd:How do we get off of here?

Genis:Well, i guess we have no choice, Explosion!

The red ball of fire came down and hit the crowd, making a giant crater in the ground ahead the Genis and he others.

Presea:What was that supposed to do, their not even stopping...

Sure enough, the stupid crowd of horney women were running straight to the crater falling into it. Its not because they werent stopping that surprised him, it was because they werent just going around it instead of going into it.

Lloyd: A giant hole full of randy women, hmmmmmmm...

Genis:...You need help

Presea: I advise one of you do something because i do not want to fall into that crater and get pumled by hordes of ready women of all ages...that lady looks 80...

Genis: Spread!

The tower of water came up from under them knocking them and some of the ladys they were under out of the crowd.

Lloyd: Whad you do that for Genis? Maybe some of us wanted to go in that hole!

Genis:...

Presea:...idiot...

Colette: Me and you can go into our own hole Lloydie!

Everyone looked at Colette wondering how she had gotten there.

Suddenly they heard a wild call and looked over, Raine had gotten out of the stampede covered in peoples shoeprints. And she looked really MAD.Everyone got up and started running. Lloyd pointed to some old abandoned gas station and they went inside.

Lloyd: I know how we can escape, we can use these two bikes here

Colette: Two bikes wait that means...

(2 minutes later)

Colette:...That means we have to partnerup, IM WITH LLOYDIE!

Genis:Dumbass...

Colette:I get to sit on Lloydies lap. YAY! YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

Genis: Your so shallow...

Lloyd: Sorry Colette, ummmm...Genis is sitting with me.

Colette:He is?

Genis: I am?

Lloyd: Yes he is...

Colette: WHAT!

Colette now had murderous intent in her eyes glaring at Genis.

Presea: If you think im going to ride with Colette i will kill you all...

Genis: Umm...i think i can fix that

Lloyd: Now everyone put on these jackets, its the only way you can ride these bikes

Genis: why?

Lloyd: Because these bikes belong to a bike club i joined

Genis: Alright

(5 minutes later)

Colette: Ive always wanted to be a kite! She said grinning like the retard she was

Presea was driving the motorcycle while Colette was tied to a string that was connected to the back of the bike, so yes, Colette was like a kite.

Genis was riding behind Lloyd on the other bike.

Genis:Lloyd, do you know what these jackets say...

Lloyd:Of course i do Genis, i was the one who joined the club after all.

Genis sighed and threw the jacket off glancing at the letters before it hit the road 'Dykes on Bikes'.

As they drove out of Meltokio with the occasional noise of "Ouch" or "Ouchies" from Colette. Since Presea took her time to travel underneath lamp posts or trees just so Colette would get him by them.

Genis: Where are we even going?

Lloyd: Um, how about Sybak

Genis: Sure

Suddenly another bike went past them, and surpriseingly, Chocolat was on it. She was wearing a jacket that said 'Hoes on Wheels'

Presea: Its moments like these that i just want to drive off a cliff and end my sad and pitiful insane life...

Colette: Ow, i think i broke my nose!

Presea: And yet its times like these im very amused to be alive...

(Elsewhere)

Kratos walked up to a house and knocked on the door.

Random voice that sounds strangely familiar to Kratos: Yes?

Kratos: Um,(Ahem), im here for my appointment...

The door opened and the random man was...DUN DUN DUN...RODYLE! (Somewhere a little girl screams)

Kratos: JESUS!

Rodyle: Come in and just relax (Teehee) while i go get changed.

Kratos: I did say i was desperate but not this desperate...

And with that Kratos was out of there faster then Sheenas bra breaking.

(Elsewhere)

Pope: Pass the diapers...

(Elsewhere)

Suzie: More tea Mrs. Aurion?

Mithos: Yes please.

(Elsewhere)

Sango: Miroku quit touching my ass!

(Elsewhere)

Inuyasha: I never stopped caring about you Kikyo

Kikyo:...Im gay

(Elsewhere)

Jaken: Master Shesshomaru i love you!

(Elsewhere)

Colette: Im a real boy!

Lloyd: What?

Presea: I might be giving her brain damage

Genis:Who says she has a brain to give damage to...

Lloyd: I have a brain right Genis?

Genis:LMFAO!...i mean...yes you do Lloyd, yes you do...

Presea: Genis, cut down on computer time ok

Genis: Why..?

Presea: Because you just said laugh my ing ass off

Genis:Sorry, ill cut down

Lloyd: Cut down, why the hell would i cut down on my crack?

Genis:...

Presea:...

Colette: Lloyd just said my name YAY! YAAAAAAAAAAAAY!

(Elsewhere)

Raine was in her giant ship that was shaped like her head laughing maniacly

Raine: MUAHAHAHAHAHAHA, we shall capture them and torture them so badly that they will cry like 4 year olds, are you with me...or against me?

Kvar: With you, ill always be with you...(sweatdrop) please dont hurt me anymore...

Raine: I am bored...turn on the radio.

Kvar:Yes sir! Shit, i mean ma'am. Yes Ma'am.

Raine...

Kvar: Ill even dedicate whatever song is on the radio to you!

Raine: Very good.

Kvar turned on the radio. 'Hey,hey. Dude looks like a lady'

Kvar:oopsie...

Raine: GRRRRRRRR!

(Elsewhere)

Barbie: I thought you loved me Ken!

Ken: I do!

Barbie: Then why did you cheat on me with California Kelly

California Kelly: Because...

Barbie: Because why!

California Kelly: Beeecause

Disco lights came on and she started dancing and singing

California Kelly: I got BIG BOOBS and i cannot lie!

Yuan sighed.

Yuan: I love playing with my Barbies.

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I went a little crazy with the (Elsewhere). It was just a sudden idea. Anyway, tell me how u liked it. R&R


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